Transcript
Hello, live from a pile of words disappearing from the Trump Administration, including black, Dei diversity, female increased diversity, and women. It's an all-new terrific Tuesday edition of business pants, joined by analysts Hall. Matt mascardi. Hey. On today's. Men, who have sex with men episode. Oh, wait, that's been too. No, that's men who have sex with men, what? Who was coming? Who made that list? What is that? That's a, I don't even know what's going on. The show was called what's the show called? March 11th 2025 business nuggets today? Whoo, I love nuggets. It's hard to be funny right now. For any of you are interested in the in some of the Lamb jokes, the beginning of the show, The New York Times has had a has a piece called these words are disappearing in the new Trump Administration. This is a report compiled by several of their reporters so I'm not making this up. If you want to feel extra stupid and depressed check out that article. Don't worry I will make it up later on. Okay. Our show today is being sponsored by free flow analytics.com. The only platform measuring board power connection performance for free. And what I hear from the inside, Matt, is that the platform is constantly being improved, worked on enhanced. Well, let's say that the data is constantly being improved in the platform. Oh, if look the platform is this stuck. It's stuck on Kash Patel, I'll pick a picture of cash. We're very friendly with the founders of free flow analytics, if you're like a coder. Who wants to do something that could be important, but doesn't need a lot of money to live. Like, feel free to reach out to us. We'll put you in touch with the founders because or if you have a friend who because right now, this platform could be like 50 times bigger with all sorts of cool bells and whistles but you know it's free it's it's free. So freeze you the basics that you need, you look up every company. The date is updated. Its maybe nephew or niece or child, who who wants to flex their coating skills and add their, at, their experience to their resume is yeah. Maybe you have a subscription to chat, cheapy tea and and I don't know what that means. What nuggets? All right, nugget me. Oh, we had a lot of nuggets. I love a lot of nuggets. This is show could be 70 minutes, it'd be fine. Okay, I'm gonna start, I'm gonna start with the bunch of blowhards and Tech Bros I guess I already don't like it. I don't like it already in our Apparently he didn't appreciate the completely objective and unbiased phrase, Jeff is a smelly and very mean, Brady bald billionaire. Headline of the Week Washington Post calling this quits after article criticizing Jeff Bezos is shelved. That is an objective phrase. He could be smelly and a bratty ball. He is ball. I know, I know this calling. This is Ruth Marcus. She's been around for decades. This is a pretty, this is a pretty big writer, this isn't? This isn't like a newbie out of the University of Alberta or anything. Say. Well, an hour. I mean she wasn't objective. So now we're Jamie. Diamond says Why be women always be bitching? Wow, headline of the week. Jamie dimon says, it's only people in the middle complaining, a lot about return to office, really? Um He's talking about women with children definitionally isn't isn't most people in the middle like sit. He just said, isn't he kind of saying most people are complaining about? Here's what I think. I think he's afraid of the, the people at the lowest rung of society because he himself as and we were, we've been looking for this quote, but he himself has said to his fellows, let's not get too crazy because they're gonna come out after us one day with pitchfork did, say that Pitchfork and I think he's, obviously, he's friends with the people on the highest levels because those are his buddy. Billionaire. Yeah. So it's the kind of the weird women in the middle who have children, who who don't want him to just arbitrarily reverse office policy that I think he's, he's most talked. That's what he said, they're complaining. Matt, the the workers are completely shrill. Did he wanted something she wanted to know why I arbitrarily change my policy? oh, and our Tesla board says, did you see last night's episode of White Lotus? They're watching. They're watching Max's big runaway hit White Lotus, I guess. Okay, fun thing to do. I hear it's good. I don't I don't watch headline of the week. Elon Musk said he's running his businesses with great difficulty as Tesla stock into the fall. Oh good. If you like most somewhere in the middle, he's complaining. It doesn't. I know it's paying attention on the Tesla board, so, whatever's, Do you think they throw up the W side for whatever? I'll stay with musk unfortunately and our Kimball musk says, why would somebody hate my brother? Headline of the week. Elon Musk claims of Cyber attack caused X outages. I mean, I don't even know what that's true. I mean in the in the Elon Musk Pantheon of companies oftentimes it's his own ineptitude, that's causing problems this time. He's blaming it. Yeah I guess he initially blamed on the ukrainians, I don't, Look at the three people left alive in Ukraine. There are time hacking X. And of course, he had no evidence to support that, he just sort of blamed Ukraine, but I don't know. It could just be the fact that he fired 80% of EX workers and maybe things break. Also, if it was the ukrainians Are we upset about that? Like okay, this and now, our He learned the technique by studying how Mark Zuckerberg treats his customers and investors. Headline of the week. She Jinping. That's the leader of China. No, I did. Yeah, I used a human Chinese wall of soldiers to block. I contact between him and Mark Zuckerberg. What even is that? I mean, I like it, believe me, I like it. I don't, I don't really know why he didn't want to look at him. I mean, I kind of know why I mean, But yeah, that's how Mark, that's how Mark treats, his whole empire, Matt. I mean, that's how we treat. Investors is boards customers. Nobody can look at Mark. Nobody have you ever seen like a bird after hits a window? And it's like dead on like ground? And yeah, and then you look into its eyes. I don't do that. That, well, I feel like that's what they're avoiding. That's what you sow, you used a wallet, vanity soulless Mark Zuckerberg. And finally, my first section in our blowhards and Tech Pro section. In our, holy shit, what? I I agree with something out of the Trump Administration headline of the week. Sheep Goods. Are not part of the American dream. Trent's. Trump's treasury secretary says, I actually agree with something. I agree with The primary. Let's continue, I agree. It's from an Administration whose Prime Leader sold Bible's water bottles steaks. It was it's true that it was not important to the US economy or the consumer. All right? I'm gonna go over a while. All right I'm gonna do some I haven't been three chapters. I'm gonna do all mine. Okay, you ready? Okay I'm gonna sit back. Sit back. Enjoy some true comedy. Chapter 1 lukewarm coffee that I'm enjoying. Go ahead chapter one. Tesla is still a company. Hmm. In our I'm sorry we can't take this. It's been infested with Kimball musk's ironic cowboy hats headline of the week? Tesla owners. Offloading their cars over Elon Musk backlash are in for a nasty surprise. What's the nasty surprise? I like to think that it would be Kimball musk's. Ironic cowboy hats? But it's not. It's at the price is they buy them? Nobody wants to buy them. You know how? I know Tesla still a company Matt because they're on fire like everywhere there. Yeah. Sorry, you know, I didn't start. What are you Billy, Joel, in our 76% sales, drop in Germany, 50% drop in China, 48%, drop in Denmark. And Norway. 26% drop in France. Plus one car bitch saved headline of the week. Trump says, he'll buy a Tesla to support Elon Musk as the stock tanks. Yeah, I don't. How does that gonna help? I don't know. He's the one though. He's so he's by one. Does he think the Mac the Mago Bros will now go? I mean good. You know what if the Mega Bros like trade in their gas guzzling cars for a Tesla fine. Let what I like? If much as I hate back on, I don't care like all the like Mega the entire conservative movement, all boxes Embrace electric vehicles test, as the, as the Liberals sell theirs, and by other electric vehicles didn't let electric vehicle win this. Like they run. Yes. Hyundai just announced that they're sticking to their their keeping their Dei policies. So they're liberals will drive him and Hyundais. The conservatives will drive Tesla's. And yeah, we'll be a less stinky. Not only do we win but we know exactly who you are. We don't have to ask anymore. We have to be like, are you a conservative like Nazis and people who still say the word women. In. Our attractive about exploding Rockets dead monkeys, tunnels to know where car recalls and Nazi means headline of the week. With the stock cut in half Tesla investors want their CEO back. But why why do they what do they want to back? Yeah that did you what? It was a good part. Yeah I don't really get that part of it. Yeah. in our, also how fairies unicorns and leprechauns affect stock price headline of the week, how the musk premium influences Tesla's worth Yeah, it's articles. Like that that really do point out that there's no such thing as like alpha or meritocracies or it's all made up, it's all, it's all just Hocus Pocus. I mean, the Tesla's stock has been a meme stock since 2020. Of course. Well there was a there was a moment Matt. Yeah there was a moment like in the maybe 2019 were people thought maybe this is a pretty good car. It's possible before all the recalls hit and correct. Yeah. And in 2019 for about six months test Tesla was a real car company making real progress on a real product with a CEO. And then starting in 2020, we ended up with a Founder fetish, for a guy who's really good at raising capital and really bad at running companies, like like it's shocking that anything ever happened at a single company he's ever worked. It was worked. Yeah it was also shocking to Tesla investors that other car companies. Might also sell electric cars. That was a shock. It was surprised the surprise, it's surprised us all, but I spent like a, you know, I was at a conference in London, last summer. Look at with asset managers and one of the topics was like, how do you deal with outside Founders running and controlled companies and they were talking specifically what they were talking in Finleyville. Terms was about Bezos Zuckerberg and musk right? Do anything about Zuckerberg Oh, you know what you can do about the outside founder that wear, it's not a controlled company. I hear you could vote them out. Well, I hear that you can't do that with Zuck. But what you can do is you, you can eliminate a dual-class voting shares that give Founders, an ignorant control over the company. You can just say you can just flatly say, no, that's this is a democracy. We don't do. That could do that. You could, if they are already a dual Clash company and they don't want to change or the founder has so many shares. You can vote out the rest of the directors. For instance, not electing the brother to the board. Someone in that room said, made the argument that having Kimball musk on the board was good for Tesla to have someone to help control him. When sure investors yeah, has that person ever met Brothers by the way, they know, or even like siblings do they know the concept? I think they were an only child. Yeah. Okay. in our, I think there are some employees available with government experience headline of the week. Elon Musk says he wants to double the Doge teams head count. What does that mean? Like more AI bought? This isn't everything being run by a bot. Yeah, everything's run by a guy named Big Balls, Like 19 year old. But you just fired like the entire federal government like, like, you want to double your. I thought you were the efficiency group. You just fired everybody. What do you need? More people to fire more people? What are you doing? Plus there's plenty of talent out there now. Can we have one from Elon Musk? Oh thank you, thank you. Chapter 2, the snowflake word police the snowflake word police. Okay. Yeah, this is the second chapter in our Clark Kent is definitely not Superman. Did you not see the glasses headline of the week? Don't call it ESG. Call it resilience. You have to help me with that one. Help me out that joke, don't call it. Is she like, yes, she is Superman, but puts on glasses, calling it resilience I will admit that as a child, I never understood how they couldn't tell that Clark can't was Superman. They looked exactly. I mean it was well, first of all was the same guy, it looks exactly. Like I mean of course that's the joke. I mean he was like the best looking guy in the universe. So I mean he was noticeable. I mean I love that when he put the glasses on he pretended to be totally inept and a total dorky nerd. Yeah. And he was like wild In our, but the glasses, the glasses, look at his glasses, headline of the week. In Trump's new Purge of climate language even resilience isn't safe. Right, we can't say resilience either because that was not a resilience too. I will tell you, the resilience is not on the New York Times list. You can say it, you just or maybe we can add it. Yeah. Well, at it. Well you think the coders over there are capable of, like, adding something this last second, I don't know if they're yeah, probably delete. I see them like creating documents and then doing something just deleting the document because it's done, right? They don't get information, right? You don't need that again? No, you ever reference it again in our buy or order. Please refrain from our man. Flake trigger words, climate environment governance, sustainability woman breast noting, that boobies are fine bird. And less referring to a woman gay and less referring to Rudy Gay. The NBA player, lesbian and lesbian like really hot lesbians and all four of Trans including transgender Transportation Transformers and transcript headline of the week. Trump Administration directs federal agencies to scrub. So called woke terms, from federal websites and Communications. Yeah, the Department of Defense is also doing this because you, you reference the word gay, and they're scrubbing images and their archives that reflect, you know, canceled words, you know, they're all the words are canceling, possible gayness, and one of them was to ban the image of the Enola Gay. Which was, of course, the airplane, the military plane that dropped one of the Bombs over here, right? Yeah. So, yeah, there you go. Yeah, I mean, it is woke. Now, the place to be fair that plane was gay. It was having sex with others. The same gender as that plane. Yeah. In our, we will no longer refer to them as earnings reports either as earnings has E S and G. And did you ever notice that? Yes. From now on we will only release No to more ladies reports since it has the letters. M e r. I t. Wow, you really went for that one headlight of the week. Companies erase ESG from their earnings report. Go, that's solves things. Done. Yeah. Put your Geniuses and finally, two more. Yeah. Come on. Chapter 3. Humor is dead. In our here's a joke. How many research studies on a boss's jokes? Does it take to figure out if employees like them headline of the week? No bosses. Who think they're funny. Create emotional labor for employees says study. I don't I'm thinking back. I don't think I ever had a boss that thought they were funny. I feel relieved about that. Well, the good news is I did count all of the studies referred to in the study. 29 research studies on whether or not your boss is jokes are funny and how employees react, really? Yeah, those are academics. That's what we're spending our time. Your boss really is funny. What? About the bus who thinks they're funny? Because they are funny. Is there? I did not have a report on that. Apparently there's no objective measure, of funny Merit so you can't come up. Yes, you can't Define. Whoa, you can't Define merit and you can't find funny. No, we don't we don't have definition. And finally proving that humor is dead. And juvenile is in in our guy whose name sounds like Colin Joins Board of company named after a body part size. Proving once again, nominating committees cannot possibly be using data to make their decisions headline of the week. Yeah. My size ink appoints, Roy Golan to board of directors. Wow, that's that's magical. That's a stretch. You really you really stretched that one. That was magical. Roy Golan, that's loud. I Googled that maybe we need more of that because everyone I know is depressed. Maybe we need more like like changing words into colon to help everything about one's colon is a little funny so go for it. I'll remove the humor from the rest of the show. Okay, wrap us up on the downstream nuggets ever. And now our They tend to hog all these little creamers and they do that thing with the pizza where it's like, they don't take the next slice of pizza, you know, they'd like, they ripped that piece off and then grabbed the bigger piece which I wish that, which means they're just touching all the pizza and getting the better people. They're just gross, sorry, headline of the week. Qantas, chairman warns directors of dominant CEOs and board search. Wow! I like wow. Well, you never see, you never see board members talking about this stuff at all. I this Qantas chair with. I think that he would like our data. Frankly, the free give us a call analytics, right? I also think he would take the next piece of pizza. Not the bigger piece. Well, we should I didn't, you know, I should have looked up in the database to see if the Qantas share has more influence than the CEO because it is Australia though, where typically there's much more balanced in the boardrooms. Well let's also be clear Qantas put in place a a woman a woman who apologized for glass Cliff 500 years of sins. She yeah she actually apologized for everything the Qantas board has ever done and will do after even little in the future. Yeah that's correct. Yeah. Oh speaking of the Qantas chair, I have another another joke about the Qantas chair and our Qantas, chairman says, It's best really to make no eye contact. To silence your breathing completely. And if necessary. Crawl up into a small ball. Okay, lower your heart rate and play dead for as long as you can headline of the week. Qantas, chairman says business should not be woke or anti-woke. Doing. Don't exist. Just becoming invisible. They need to form a human wall of Chinese military. Yes to avoid looking at the outside world, I don't exist. Yeah, this is why one of my predictions was that we're gonna see fewer and fewer companies posting the pictures of their Executives and directors because they don't exist, they're just not going to exist, they're not real, no nothing's. Real, you know, in our L'Oreal says I'm pretty sure I said cinnamon. And not cancer. Headline of the week, cinnamon cinnamon, not cancer headline of the week, L'Oreal recalls acne treatment on cancer. Linked chemical. Oh, They hit that wrong. Every time. It should be that. Screw that up. How do you not know? We'll start. Let's see. Shouldn't be a database, shouldn't? They're like now big ball. 69, deleted the data immediately after putting woke actually to check into stuff like that and our The other half giggled uncontrollably. And then check their email and then just sort of quietly wandered off. Headline of the week. Nearly half of energy, Executives think we won't reach Net, Zero until 270. Where are the other half? Like wait a minute. So you could flip this entire headline over and say more than half of energy executive think we will reach Net Zero before 24 or just like who cares? Like we don't we don't I read it like they don't they don't keep track of that doesn't matter like just get away. See I read it as if they're saying nearly half of Executives. Think we won't get there until 2770 that implies to me, that more than half of them think we will get there by 270 Remains to be seen. You think Derek, what do you think Darren Woods thinks? I think he sued you just for saying his name in our hsbc's managed talk about dumb jokes in our SBA hsbc's managing director and Global head of ESG solution says I appreciate, I appreciate it actually. The tag on my new t-shirt was bugging me and I couldn't quite reach it. It was a whole thing. Headline of the week HSBC. Scratches top ESG banking role. Oh, I see what you did. It's fired, they fired Fargo managing director and Global head of ESG Solutions. Matt, she was a maternity leave. She was just about to come back and they fired. They got they fired. Wow. Nice touch HS right. He's got a classy know. Well, he just be seen. Did spawn Stuart Kirk? Yeah, I was like that in the same thing. Yeah. Back in the day and that guy did work in ESG and did was a like flaming asshole about everything like said everyone's a climate alarmist and so this is It's on brand. And finally for business nuggets, March 11th 2020. One more one more, my favorite. My favorite word, finally, in our Berkshire Hathaway director. Howard Buffett. Says. He waited in his mother's womb. For an extra two hours. Oh, despite the fact that her cervix was fully dilated, when he was just an infant to shake the stigma of being the owner's kid in earn respect headline of the week. Wow, that takes commitment. Yeah, here's the headline in and out. Billionaire errors. I'm gonna repeat that in and out. Billionaire errors. Says. She's stood in line. For two hours. To land a job at her own store when she was just a teenager to shake the stigma of being the owners kid and earn respect. Why? Wow, she waited two hours. Officially Blue Collar. Matt. If you wait for two hours for anything. You're officially working class. She did it. She did it two hours. When they saw that her name was in Chinese Schneider. They didn't check the name. They didn't check her W-2s. They just didn't do any of that. Not only not do also pointing out that like so, you run, you're running a store, you know. Exactly. The owner is and her name is spelled like l y, n s. I This there's like one on Earth, but missing the appointment two hours. It was waiting for something. She waited. Wait, don't tell me, was it? Sunny out at least was cloudy, right? I mean, it is not always sunny. Well, was it hot? I mean in California that I mean that must have been brutal. I can't imagine waiting two hours but who knew that that eliminates the stigma of being a nepo baby is just pretending to get a job at your daddy's company. Like, that's what I have so many questions. Where was this line? Was it inside or out? Like, who else was applying really waiting in line for two hours to get fast food. Jobs, what that, what's the state of the economy in California? I wonder, did she spend the entire time in line wearing a hat with sunglasses on? So no one would recognize her musk branded hat. Like with the Mark Zuckerberg watch worth 300,000 dollars so many questions, so many questions. That's the Fizz nuggets for the day. That's, I am your own soulmate where free flows not to be confused with free flow analytics. Yeah, sponsors the show analytics.com. That's the website for an This time go get your free data and seriously if you're like a code or you want to do something fun and you don't care about money, we are fun and we don't have any. So we're welcoming you with open arms. Come join us. We have another show on Friday where we wrap up the week. We've got a proxy countdown where we're talking about all the proxy, contests, we treat agms like sports, get that. And we all have a show. We produce well for Mike, Levin and Lipton called shareholder Primacy. They're real people. Yeah. And I think I see in the New York Times basically on the, on the Daily Now weak. She's weak. She's always. She's literally the smartest person, I think I've ever met so go nevermind. Never, I don't see you in there. No, well, I don't, yeah, correct. You don't see me in their appropriately. That's all we got. Come back later till then. Goodbye.