Transcript
Oh, live from a Danish spicy sausage Farm. Oh, sounds good. Is that a spicy sausage Farm in Denmark? I don't really know where where we are today. What maybe it's just even though it's that they put Spice in, can you grow a spicy sausage? I don't really understand. It's yeah, another manic one day edition of business pants. Joined as always by analysts whole map of scarcity. That's right. in today's, Witch came first MSG, or ESG bag of research base snark called February 5th, 2024 Biz nuggets, which did come first. There's a lot of different ways of answering that from a purely from the perspective of a librarian, a cataloging librarian. I would say the ESG came first. Oh, see you're going out for medically from the took that I took that route? From the perspective of use, I would also say, ESG came first, our show today is being sponsored by free flow analytics. The only ESG data platform to measure real board influence and diversity. Power Gap does do that. And they did sponsor us because they are us. You ready? I'm ready? Let's do it. like I did too many by mistake this week, in our The other 98% goes to keep the protein bars at room temperature in Tech CEOs, doomsday, prepper underground Panic mansions in Iowa. Sorry. Now why headlines of the week I'm already messed up. I messed up. Just just, you know, the jokes aren't even important here. Just listen to this headline, Matt over 2% of the US's electricity Generation. Now goes to bitcoin. Why? That is as massive. That's ridiculous. Unbelievable. in our, Before we get to the next vote, on net income goals for the third quarter. Could you pass the low-fat cream cheese? And the ketamine? Is it in the cream cheese? Headline of the week? Elon musk's company directors, feel an expectation. To use drugs with him to avoid. Upsetting the billionaire. Oh, Man that actually would severely limit your director pool. Like you're not out there like looking for talent. You're looking for drug use friends. But your Linda Johnson rice left the board of Tesla, because of her concern of Elon Musk. The CEOs drug usage was she also concerned, maybe she showed up, and she was like, you're all on drugs right now. What kind of board meeting of which And our hey Ma Dad was right friends. Do like to get high together headline of the week. Elon Musk took drugs with Tesla board members. It's unbelievable. But you would, if they're your buddies that's what you do with your buddies, you get high. You know what we are? We did a show back at msci, five years ago. ESG now was the name of the podcast. They still run it but it's not the same way as it was where we told a story about Nolan Bushnell. The founder of Atari and we compared him to Steve Jobs. And we basically said is Elon Musk more Nolan Bushnell or Steve Jobs, meaning, you have a interesting founder with a crazy Vision. Nolan Bushnell surrounded himself with his friends. They had hot tub parties where they grabbed, you know, women's asses they would do drugs and get drunk all the time. And Steve Jobs got pushed out by his board because he was too much of a jerk for them, and they didn't like that. He had so much vision and we posed the question then who? Is Elon Musk. How what is an investor? What kind of board do you want? Do you want the board that sits in the hot tub? Or do you want the board that might push him out? We now know the answer We have Nolan Bushnell, Atari famously, failed it. Crashed brilliantly. I can't wait for this the post mortems on how this board helped Elon Musk Drive Tesla. What happens? I they that's what that's what they cannot keep him. They can't keep it in our What do CEOs? Know about higher education? Everything shut up headline of the week. Kenneth Frazier, Joseph Bay to join Harvard Corporation ahead of presidential search. That's the board at Harvard University. That's KKR Coco CEO. Joseph Bay and former Mercy CEO. Ken, Frazier, is that good to joining the board is that good? in our, Five year old reverses, his pledge, not to eat, one more piece of Halloween, candy headline of the week. Bank of America reverses its pledge, not to finance fossil fuels. What I can't believe it. It finally, this first section here, before I hand off, to Matt with, with much better jokes. Many much better headlines in our Bully tells victim on playground. Sorry, I checked the bylaws and I still have to punch you in the face, even though you gave me your milk money, headline of the week, not fun. Exxon pursues lawsuit, despite activist investor climb down. So yes, Matt, the activist investors they drop their proposal but exons gonna carry through with the lawsuit. Yeah, go get him Exxon. Here is I'm gonna start my round with something that's Vaguely Familiar from one second ago. In our in today's, can I say, pure coincidence, I was I did not set it up this way. In our in today's self-defense class will be practicing cowering in fear followed by the first technique to grovel and please headline of the week, Exxon pursues lawsuit, despite active, as investor climb down. I think as a company we could quit right now. This is a genius coincidence and headline Joker with what I have a problem. Why did they climb down? I don't want to get sued by a behemoth with 4,000 high-priced lawyers. You're gonna get expensive no matter what either that sounds really expensive. Look either the shareholder Proposal that you put forward. Is legitimate or it's not them. Suing you does not delegitimize, the proposal. I think you go through with the proposal. It's already out there. It's art, like, do it? Just do it. Oh, it and F them. you know, our The next 10K will list, Dave Calhoun, and the board as a quality glitch headline of the week. Exclusive New Quality glitch to delay, some Boeing 737, Max deliveries. Yeah, what is that? That's from Reuters. What's a quality glitch? Who's riding that, who's got a quality glitch, the glitch was they found? They drilled holes in places. They were not supposed to drilled holes. No, Matt. The glitch was replacing the fail. CEO. Overseeing a failed safety regimen with one of his friends from the board. Well that's an older glitch. Yeah, okay. Got it, you know, our speaking of quality glitch headline of the week. A Tesla driver used an apple Vision Pro while cruising on autopilot he got arrested, it's even worse than that. I think he was in a cyber truck a Tesla cybertruck. Imagine that scene like isn't that like Evolution at work like is that we know people out deep Evolution, right? It's really the number of things. I've watched a lot of Vision Pro like reviews and stuff and the first things everyone does is something that Apple says, do not do this while wearing the Vision. Pro one woman, went skiing one guy was on the skateboard. This guy's using auto pilot. These are all the dumbest things you can do. In our, the only answer is taking a cruise headline of the week. I've been on nearly 30 cruises here are 16, big mistakes, passengers make Okay. See what I did there. Yeah, I see you like talking about. You like making fun of hate norovirus machines. In our from now on women will be referred to as milk, maids and milkmaids will be referred to as utter pullers. And utters will be referred to as cow boobs. Everything else is woke headline of the week. Oh, West Virginia bill would ban woke words. Such as pregnant people from government Communications. Seems like a problem solving. Yeah. Yeah. Nothing says useful. Like, banding some words that you can use. In our wait, fake apologizing to Congress for exploiting children worked. You mean we got away with it? Oh okay. Yeah, send out. The press release that we are firing a bunch of ass hats due to our quote, commitment to profitable growth while running the business with greater efficiency headline of the week. Snap to cut 10% of global Workforce. Matt. This is days after apologizing to Congress that they couldn't figure out how to save children from being exploited. Yes. After but they said Zuckerberg did all the cuts last year. So snap is realizing oh wait. No one cares. Nobody cares. Up in our drugs CEO is also fake surprise men will buy pills that cure baldness and that teenagers will buy pills that cure acne headline of the week. Novo Nordisk CEO says he was surprised to see the popularity of weight loss drugs in Europe, Why would people want to, what would people want to drug for that, man? We give them a pill that allows them to immediately lose weight. That's surprising that people want that. By the way at a new game I'm doing here, I'm not tracking the the citation of CEO names. His name is actually Lars Freer guard, your concern and his name appeared in paragraph three of this article, not even in the caption of his picture. Did they listen this man's name which seems to break, journalistic standards. Know, you're supposed to tell people what the picture is about. What it is, what the subject of the picture is. Well, they were too busy focused on the way there. Yeah. In our white Tech bro. CEO that controls his company's shares and voting power admits that he likes when racists make him more money headline of the week. Spotify. Signs reported, 250 million dollar Joe Rogan deal. Two years after CEO denounced podcast, hosts racist language. But added I do not believe that. Silencing Joe is the answer. No. Okay, Matt. His name is Daniel Eck, that's the CEO of Spotify. In his name appeared in paragraph, 8 of this article, they couldn't name this guy until paragraph 8, is it worth saying that Spotify is Daniel EK? There isn't other. They would know other than if you the audience who listens to this show here, a businessman's in our, Zuck. Already stood up at apologize. So this is technically yesterday's news headlines of the week. As social media execs were getting grilled in Congress, YouTube spent hours hosting a Grizzly, atrocity video, then it spread to X. So, that Matt, this is a video of a man who beheaded his father, because he was a, he was angry at woke people. He beheaded his father, he carried around the head, it was all live shooting on YouTube, and I'm gonna remind you that Google cut 12,000 workers last year. And it's, and it's now all the laying off. Hundreds of employees working on a hardware voices, assistance and Engineering blah, blah blah. And finally, let me wrap up because I think I'm ruining the show with my horrible computer. in our, How about you promised not to tell us what to do? And we swear to God and hope to die. Double triple quadruple, pinky promise to fix all this. Made up climate change shit before we're all dead headlines of the week. Oh, Exxon CFO. Says Biden's halt on new natural gas. Exports is a mistake and harms the world achieving Net, Zero sooner. Oh no, that's a super believable messenger. Yeah, that's a CFO Kathy Nichols over there at Exxon. Believe it or not, they have these people have names. What where what paragraph was that name in? Can't be. That was actually the first paragraph. I'll give them credit for that one. Wow. Well done. All right, let's wrap this up. You know, our you're gonna recognize this headline, ish in our, we need more, give us more more, more more headline of the week. Novo by three plants for 11 billion to boost will Govi output? Yeah. Well, a lot of prize That they're now buying three plants for 11 billion dollars so they can make more of it. It's weird to all these obese. People don't want to really be obese because they can take a pill that's weird and are Does AI need an HR rep. Headline of the week. Chief AI officer is Tex hottest new role, but finding workers with the right skills. This tough Does the chief AI officer? Did they just manage the AI? Like, an HR person they do. Is it actually, is it? An avatar. Is, what is it to be a person? I don't know. I I don't know what that even is. in our, does this count as abortion headline of the week? Foxconn see slightly better, 2024 warns of AI chip shortage. Okay, what's Happening Here? So this is a chip shortage and you can't bring AI to life. Well, is that terrible? I'm just wondering I wire the joke writer for that one. I want to know when the conservative State or the national legal policy, Research Center, or whatever, we'll file a shareholder proposal saying, not bringing AI to life is a form of I will say that other headlines that we didn't choose for today's show. There's a scientist who developed an AI child, a kid a Child AI, child and all. So on the on chat, gbt on the open AI, they had these add-ons and every and I guess the most popular add on for their open AI software is AI, girlfriends. Yeah, well, that's so you might be onto something. You might be honest, something. We're gonna, I actually here's my prediction Right Here. And Now, AI ends up having more rights than women within the next 10 years. I I wish I could. I wish I could disagree with that one. Unfortunately. I can't. In our remember, when we hadn't yet invested deeply in body dysmorphia and suicidal ideation. I mean can you believe it? We've come so far headline of the week, Facebook turns, 20 nogal, images reveal, what Mark, Zuckerberg's original website, look like when it launched in 2004 and how much it's changed since. Yeah, I'm calling. This is the one really one of the many negative effects of the Elon musk's cult, right? That the cult by the cult. I mean, the way that the people and the media worships Elon Musk, is that Mark Zuckerberg? Looks normal. He just looks like a normal nerd like making like computer programs. He looks like a College Dropout, making the future of political disintegration and and Democratic disintegration out of here. Finally, in our. So just like the user's headline of the week. Mark, Zuckerberg's high-risk activities risk, Serious injury and death. Metal warns investors in the 10K. The among the risk factors they list Mark, Zuckerberg's high-risk activities, like Combat Sports and parasailing. Yeah. As serious injury and death risk, that could hamper operations. But like to say, yeah, go ahead. That the users, using the platform that Mark Zuckerberg is made, has some of the same risks. What I like is it this, I think this is a coated way of saying our horrible horrendous should be illegal. Corporate governance structure means that if our dictator founder God, Jesus dies were fucked. That's basically what it says. Nobody else is wearing the company. There are no checks and balances That is all we got for business pants or Biz nuggets that hazelnut Rallis. I am your analyst told me Scotty. We are free float, we'll be back on Wednesday with a wolf, Wednesday and Thursday. Go get the proxy countdown, actually content, good show, proxy countdown serious, sup Not Stupid humor. There's no swearing know, horrible joke kids on. There's no horrible jokes. There's only well there's some horrible jokes um but it's not normal. It's back. This is no this is a snark Fest you go over there. You're getting dated driven recommendations about how to analyze companies. It's not a show like there's nothing else like it if you like sports radio and sports analysis and you like business news and companies, that's it. That does the thing. So go get that. Otherwise we'll talk to you, whatever. We talked to you until then goodbye.