Transcript
Hello, live from the silver. Forgot this in Mark Zuckerberg's decaf matcha latte. Oh, it's your daily dribble up its nuggets. I like what other people write these for me? It's more exciting. It's like you're finding it out. Yeah. I might say something horrible and I won't even know it joined as always, by erudite, Emma lurking and multitudinous Matti. I'm pocket fluff. That's actually accurate today. In our, fungible tokenized back of nuggets called January 13th. 2022, Matt averse is back. Damien tries to create a dystopia metaverse mashup and Emma forgets, who she is. Oh, Emma. I'm not. That's not my name today. Please don't refer to me as such All right, this is a show that should have been put on an hour from now. So let's hope our non editing works because I got a lot of weird stuff about. Tell people know the difference if I didn't. maybe it enhances my Crack Pottery, here we go. Ready. Yep. Yeah, I'm ready. Oh, I realized this morning that all things crypto, nft metaverse work from home. Are really just our dystopia, right? So I began wondering if we need a Rebrand like a meta. Topia, this verse a motopia So in order of my semiotic ramblings, I thought I would focus squarely today on my ongoing, miseducation of metaverse tapioca. In fact, the big news is that I have decided to embrace my first potential conspiracy theory. But I do not, I actually feel comfortable in the space and here it is that the great coronavirus pandemic of the 2020s. It was actually created by armetta verse overlords to accelerate us into its virtual crypto meta, bear hug. Wow. Understand that. Yeah. So you're saying basically Mark Zuckerberg created coronavirus? I don't know. I'm not putting on one person, I don't know. But in these stories today that I that I read that Emma gather just it's just all just all came to me. I'm good. Let's go. Okay. So let's go down crazy listener of my new stereo unveil the headlines that almost like the construction of Stonehenge represent, the virtual building blocks of my newfound frenzy, at least it's my new friend until the camera stopped rolling. And I revert, back to the dough makes a sandwich for lunch. So anyway, here we go. Ham today. Robin Hood is a remote first company. That's the first part of my new conspiracy building. Yeah, here we go. From the companies announcement. We are excited to announce that. Robin Hood is will be, staying primarily remote? Okay, so before they share that they're at the that there are employees at their mission to democratize. Finance Sons, weird too blah, blah blah for a large saying of our employees. There will be no location or regular in office. Requirement, see a metaverse slip and slide. Accelerant, why go anywhere anymore? See Okay here I like this. I know you're laughing man is perfect for this. Not have been possible pre-pandemic know, it wasn't that I Incorporated Corporation is basically becoming work from home entirely. I Will Wait part of part of the reason they're probably doing this is do you remember the protests in front of the Robin Hood offices? Because some part of it suicide people want me back to that later. There's like a I have a you're not gonna protest in front of Paul's house like it's not gonna have defense coming up later. Oh Robin Hood went on to say we also recognized that remote work and create unique challenges for people from underrepresented groups throughout the pandemic, women black latinx employees, across the country have left, the workplace and alarming rate. That's why we're committed to making sure our model Works in a way that supports inclusion equity and belonging blah, blah. Okay? So not only do we have corporations becoming permanently worked from home, but they're even laying the groundwork for our post racial metaverse experience. Where our physical traits will be subsumed by our meta avatars. See what they're doing here. no, you He was Robin Hood. It means they're, we're not our physical bodies are leaving us Emma. We're not gonna need them anymore in the meta where we're going. I'm okay without gonna need them. I don't need a body. Bodies are a lot of Damian lost me at, hey, what's the perfect solve for this? Because corporations cannot figure out how to get black people involved? How to get women involved. They can't just can't do it. So, this is the perfect solution to this. I don't know why. We have is a cool being behind. I don't know why. We haven't. Relegated you to conspiracy theories before. This is brilliant of us. I would argue why. Yeah, there's more to support my theory, but you want me to just do all of mine, or do you want me to handle now? We gotta chop it up. I, I think we need to we're gonna break this up. Hand me the tin foil and let me give you some real news. Here's what I've got here. I'm gonna actually, I'm gonna say right at the onset, here, everything I'm about to say is totally real. There's no conspiracy theory. I'm leaving out most of the commentary. There is nothing about this that I am making up. Okay, here's the headline where you go. I want to I want to tell everyone that none of my shit's made up either. In fact, none of this universe that we've created here, this company is ever made up its all fact-based snark, all research except for the coronavirus, pandemic was okay there's a few everything is always factors. This is a lot of research goes into. Go ahead, go ahead. Here's the headline. Okay. Virtual land, developer metaverse group is investing up to one million dollars in a platform where users can buy digital versions of Central Park in the Eiffel Tower, how many of Central Parks and Eiffel towers are. There is my question, just wait for it. Ready on September 3rd, 2021, a company called metaverse group. This is not like meta platforms. This is not Zuckerberg. This is a group in Canada. Say that it existed, they filed their corporate documents. September 3rd 2021 by November 30th of 2021. The company had sold 50% of itself for 1.7 million dollars to tokens.com. And the founders overnight were millionaires. Well, single millionaire the metaverse group is now an offshoot of token.com publicly, traded nft and crypto company. The CEO of metaverse group. His real name is Lauren Sugarman even sounds like a metaverse avatar to me. Here is what they do. This is the what they currently offer a plan to offer. They offer buying and selling a virtual real estate across the metaverses. Multiple Development of virtual land says, we help you bring your dream to life. So imagine just like in the real world when you buy that plot of land and you're like, I could picture my perfect house here. They'll help you develop it with contractors and probably there's going to be some permits involved. You'll be a porta potty outside of your metaverse building for a long time. Expert level Consulting for all. Major metaverses. Here's my favorite finding a rental within the metaverses to fit any need. Boom. Real estate rentals in the metaverse then they'll offer second for your rental. The space outside of Emma's window on her fire escape, just to, to met us to meta like irritator. You can met a sit with the meta pigeons. Yeah. They all also offer Property Management of existing real estate, you know? Like that's like real like leaky rooms. Is that real life? Exit? Okay. Yeah. They're gonna deal with that kind of stuff and marketing and advertising. The metaverse group is investing one million dollars in this gets to Emma's question in superworld. We're users can buy one of the metaverse eyes can buy and sell versions of global landmarks, including Mount Rushmore, and the Great Wall of China. The initial investment of 250000 dollars were purchase plots of virtual land on the super world platform, featuring augmented reality content, For world is basically Google maps of the real world, where you actually buy an nft version of the land on Google Maps. So, you can finally re-buy your currently property cheaper than you actually bought it in the real. Get a meta version of my own house. You can get an nft metaverse version of your house like the stupid roof or anything. No cleaning. There's no nothing. You're in place. Just crumbled down. Because who cares? I'll have my because my medicine if you're perfect. If you're real house, cost 200,000, you could probably spend 50,000 on them, cancel my heat, my yeah. My, um, each plot. So you can get metaverse mortgages. This is this is gonna be a thing. Each plot of nft land on super world translates to the real world equivalent of 100 by 100 meters so about the size of a stadium. So you can make your house stadium side. A metaverse. In the metaverse. Of course, I want a bigger than that. Sorry that's the limitation. You just have to buy more metaverse group is behind one of the most expensive virtual land deals on record to date with a 2.43 million dollar purchase of parcels in decentraland. Creative a blockchain based 3D Universe, where some land can be monetized. The digital land in decentraland Fashion, District is the most expensive. After reading all of this, I actually went to decentraland with Ari without you and With the two of us were walking through the central lands, we went together, we were looking at nft art in that was for sale in decentraland and I will say this as my final talking point, none of this is made up, this is all real real proportional fans. Buy metaverse stock, this is the.com bubble all over again. If you get in early, you can make a ton of fake money doing fake things in a fake place with fake versions of arguably real people. This is the best idea I've ever heard in my entire life and I'm terrible like, real people actually rich. Now, yes, and it's not you probably. So let's go back to conspiracy Damian, because my thing was real, I'm all about conspiracies right now, back to conspiracy theories. I was inside for those institutions to educated the executives at metaverse group. I think it's time to revoke their diplomas. Saying, let's start. Here we go. In more metaverse news. This is an early favorite for our first metaverse, emperor. I don't I need more time to think of a better name there, but here we go. A Metapod Jack Dorsey to launch a legal defense fund for Bitcoin developers, okay? That's the headline, okay? Channel your channel DC Comics while. I read this Jack Dorsey the CEO of block an ex CEO of Twitter. Ooh, has proposed creating a non-profit organization to protect their rights and interests of Open Source, Bitcoin developers who are often subject to litigation threats. The Bitcoin legal defense fund is a non-profit entity, aims to minimize legal headaches. That discouraged software developers from actively developing Bitcoin related projects. In fact, this past October Bitcoin core maintainer. Jonas, schnelle step down from the project, citing increased legal risk for Bitcoin developers and suggesting that the new contributors join anonymously. This is exciting for two reasons. All this talk about defense and legal risks. Sounds like the start to a superb, new Marvel franchise where directors is our masked. Our bearded Superhero fighting antiverse crime. It's a metaverse Batman reboot. A superhero born of a Spider by their nuclear blast, but of deep crypto pockets and desire to be virtually loved second, the suggestion that new contributors join anonymously circles directly back to our post-racial Avatar foreword vision. He really is conspiracy. It's like prove me wrong here. Prove me wrong here. Something something's a brewing that's all I'm saying. And it, you know, the real conspiracy is I wore an X-Men shirt today. I can't control it. No, you're gonna do a whole Marvel bit about the matter first. it's A conspiracy. Well thankfully none of my shit is about the metaverse so you're welcome. Oh thank God, I just stick to you, go back to the not conspiracy music, it's making me feel dizzy. Hi, I'm Ari the data. Queen Emma was feeling a little extra depressed by the world today. So I'm subbing in Welcome to headlines that make existence, almost tolerable part 1, oh Ari. I mean, I don't to call you you're curious. Is it cheerful? Emma, Emma, Emma. As Ari doing, I'm happy being happy right now do it. Come on. First up, we have FTC has a plausible claim that Facebook isn't illegal Monopoly. The FTC has refiled an antitrust lawsuit against Facebook and a judge has denied Facebook's motion to dismiss the case which has happened once before. The FTC is arguing that Facebook employees in anti-competitive practice dubbed by, and Berry in which companies buy up competitors, in order to prevent Innovation from challengers in order to prevent losing their market, share, make a lot of sense. My dream outcome is as such Judge James boasberg rules in the ftc's favor, Facebook is forced to sell WhatsApp and Instagram and Zuckerberg resigns in shame. I'm manifesting it Matt. Don't interfere, I can feel your Vibes their back. Well that's why he created meta platform. So he doesn't have he doesn't have to resign from he just he stays with, right? He just Jackson and meditation. He sees it coming and that's why he's he doesn't have to don't conspiracy my segment. That keep that in your segment, this is a conspiracy. I'm agree with you. Shut your mouth. Did you realize that he renamed his company? Meta platforms? I'm not. None of my stuff is made up. How do you mean? Do you hear the Paranormal Loop? Mix Down music. I don't I don't, you don't I don't to headline number two, a part one with this 125 dollar investment. There's about to be a lot more mushroom leather, mushroom, leather manufacturer micro works, is building a mass production facility in South Carolina with their new shiny 125 million dollar investment. So, going back for a second, we answered a question from a listener, who goes by sustainability. Sarah about, mushroom leather a little while ago and Matt said that he liked it, but it would take forever to mass produce. As Ari I can't be quite as mean to Matt as usual, but it feels like he was wrong and that's something that should be pointed out. Just say. Now, I was in wrong, she wake me up when they actually the end. Can't wait for part two. Yeah, you cropped on me. This is why this is why I know I love Beyond me because again, it's a metaverse play. We're we're just getting into faking stuff but just turn on the music. Quick, turn off, right? First step is to make the burger out of a plant-based thing, but the second, we're just getting there. We're getting there and all my stories. Prove it. Here's my next one. Black bean. Burgers were the 70s version of the metaverse. Here's my next story, crypto crypto companies. Bet. New mayor will make New York digital asset Hub. This is a story about New York City's, new crypto fetish C. Mayor, Eric Adams. Who has pledged to turn the Big Apple into a crypto of? You're welcome. Emma. And now I understand why seemingly all of New York hated to term Mayor Bill de Blasio. Bill was more of a Samuel Beckett play in the back pocket. Bicycling to a Brooklyn Co-op, wearing a dorky helmet hanging out with his big. Afro son, lumbering around his gawky six foot five inch frame, kind of guy and other words, the dude took up too much physical space. The metaverse is post physical with the old and in with the new and Eric Adams couldn't be more perfect, really. He's already acting like a CEO already in hot water for naming. A Virginia parking administrator and retired police Sergeant to a top position in the New York Police Department because of one key qualification. He was the mayor's brother We're talking about a brother. Let's call him Kimball Adams, who retired? In 2006 2006, he retired being handed one of the most sensitive Elite jobs in city, government overseeing, the unit that will protect the mayor's physical safety, A dude who works in parking Administration. That's foreshadow. Okay. Unlike the enduring ego of Elon Musk Adams has already canceled, Kimball Adams promotion. Oh well, no matter. Eric Adams is still the perfect Commissioner Gordon to Gotham's metaverse. You are? You almost seems surprised. By some sort of nepotism as someone named like in the metaverse, it would have been Florence, nothing at who put their daughter. Fusion Ali Muffet well no matter verse. It won't be genetic. You know ties we don't have to reveal. Who Kimball Adams is you know it's true it could have been just a cat named Dingus giving it to and look like an avatar was appointing. A parking administrator. Who retired in 2006 to oversee and protect his physical safety. You're not going to need to protect. Oh say for that long. That's why you hire a relic. Who is bringing array back. This is the incorrect music, Damien, bring medari back. All right, the data Queen. Or two first up we have it's not the highest paid. Female athletes score a record 167 million dollars, the combines salaries of the top 10, female athletes in the world have increased 23% since 2020 in 16th since 2013, which held the record previously with 143.3 million dollars. Our top earners is Naomi Osaka with 50. Evan 3 million dollars for the year. Good job women, you're doing great. And finally, our last headline is more than 8,000 Kroger workers in Denver have gone on strike demanding better, pay benefits and working conditions. Do I have to say more collective bargaining? Labor Justice worker solidarity sticking it to wealthy, exploitative corporations. It's really great stuff Kroger told the Wall Street Journal that the union was being Reckless and self-serving. Well, 75% of Kroger workers, are food insecure, 50% are unable to afford their rent and 75% reported ongoing anxiety. Asking your employer for basic food and housing, security, doesn't strike me as just serving, but what do I know? Kroger CEO made 22 million dollars in 2020. So he must know something, we don't anyway, don't cross the picket line, happy Thursday, I'm Ari. What are you Ari today? Are you a little confused though? You championing this third amount of money that athletes are making and then you're pissing on. The Kroger CEO for making today is a day. 4. Why why, why do athletes have to make so much money for hitting a ball around? So you so you don't want to hear that. Conor McGregor made 180 million in 2020. He's more. Thank you. We're back. Thank you. We're back to creepy. And finally, I hate that this has to end. I don't want this to end. I could I could probably 24/7. Keep doing this. Maybe we should have a live feed or something. Here we go. And finally, in what is surely a sneak peek into all the horrible ways? You might accidentally lose your entire life, savings by accidentally watching the sunset of the meta versus 12th son called coin gold run instead of the fourth son called macro Blaze or get what I'm going here. It's gonna be a confusing. Just all right, literally you've out. Now, they're foxes coming. Believe me, Emma's coming. Here's the headlines. Scammers are putting QR code stickers on parking meters. Let that linger, there. Parking meters to trick people into pain. Police in San Antonio. And Austin said, they found fraudulent QR code on parking meters. The QR codes, took victims to scam websites, soliciting payment, Jason Redfern, parking division manager, Barbara should take over Eric's, Eric Adams, security patrol. He worked for the Austin transpiration Department, that's a, that's actually error from the article. I don't understand that one but Anyway, he said they found stickers on 29 out of 900, public meters as an aside. The number of Fortune 500 female CEOs hitting all-time record in 2021 41. So 29 is nothing to sneeze at here. Redford said, we don't use QR codes at all for this very reason because they are easy to fake or place on the devices. Exactly Jason. Thank you for that question. Early Peek into my Meta Knight mirrors, the everything will be easy to fake, And I also finally understand what the children's book are You My Mother where a baby bird goes in search of his mother not knowing what she looks like was trying to teach me that were all fucked because even if you know what your mother or your crypto account looks like the metaverse will ensure that you can never truly know which one is real and which one is a goddamn sticker. All right, before you turn off music and we wrap this show, I do want to say that the story the stories today have included the name's Jason Redfern. Lauren Sugarman, James boasberg and Jonah. If there were Faker names in the universe, I don't know what they could be. That was Damian creepy, relish Emma lurking in the shadows and Matt, I'm living in the real world mascardi. We are free float media that was business pants. Those were our daily dose of biz nougats. If you want more of those, go get them on, Apple and Spotify and all those places or just tune in tomorrow, where we're gonna live stream, it's some random time when you won't be around, Russia, actually tomorrow. Is our Friday show, where we wrap up the wheels back. Hopefully we all right, here we have a nice super long segment where Damian can crawl into a tin foil hole and we can all with that. I made a pretty good case. Will be back at you tomorrow with more creepy.