Business Pants – 2022-07-19

Live. From all of your most disgusting sweaty parts to Tuesday, Uber nugget edition of business pants. Join us always by Emma nugget face, lurking. And Matt nugget but mascardi. Okay, with that. Would you would you prefer that to be reversed? You're okay with that. He has. This is definitely the Crassus intro that you've ever done nugget face nugget but I'm pure nugget. No one talks about nougat enough. Maybe for good reason know, they talk about a plenty and today's Google shaped bag of Exxon flavored nuggets called July 19th. 2022, not get Here, let's do it. Okay, go Ready. You are. Okay in our Why are we doing this? All right. Okay, in our, your CEO is a long-term risk part 496, headline of the week. Some drivers say they're ditching Tesla over Elon. Musk's politics. I don't want Tesla cars to become the new Mega hat. Oh I think that's a really good comparison. Am I crazy? Because, you know, I have to admit there is some very visceral reaction in me when I see a Tesla. But what about what is that? What is that reaction? Negative. What does that? When did it start? probably the moment I met the two of you actually, we are just in our, I don't really have a joke here, but can this be a thing? No, confidence vote for CEOs, headline of the week. McDonald's franchisees. Overwhelmingly support. No confidence vote on CEO. Are they going? What is that? I think we going through CEOs. Like crazy. Or is it just? Yes, the answer is. Yes. Yes. What is a? No confidence vote from a franchisee. I mean is that like yeah that like passing a note and someone's Locker being like I don't like you and then walking away. What does that mean? I don't know as we develop our product and we're working on some kind of a hate index for directors, how much you're sure holders. Hate you, why would yes true? I aren't CEOs. Part of this. I mean they get voted on if they're on the board but that doesn't count. I like this. For the board. I do their job. Hypothetically. So I was bored isn't doing their job and holding a no-confidence vote. Apparently someone else had to take it into their franchisees will. Yeah, they can do it in England. Next year. French fries will do a no-confidence vote. Yes, in our, he needs to have hair. Goddammit, you're destroying everything. I've combed around here headline of the week. Former Disney CEO Eiger. Battled board was unhappy with shape picks succession. I read that story, it was really good. Why was he unhappy? Can someone give me a brief? I guess he's bold. I mean, I'm not know. I was, apparently it didn't have anything to do with hair loss. It did have to do with everything from calling him a novice and didn't realize it on such issues, as don't say gay and the bill and and how he handled the coronavirus epidemic to not liking. And then J, pick didn't like, the way I was budding in on everything, it was classic and I grew immediately regretted not staying at Disney. It's it's Classics. It's classy. Retired. Like six times before. You just like retire and let it be someone else's problem. Bob Iger does not have to work another day in his life, just make it someone else's. Probably, I just don't understand. This is his baby. Yeah, no it's raised it and anti-semites baby Emma. Can you that? I am the Chris Rock of the ESG news world, all my alopecia jokes against Bob chapek. I mean I'm a terrible person where is Will Smith become slap me. I don't agree with that. I need to be a little bit so you you agree. That Will Smith should have slapped Chris Rock. You how dare you? How dare you? I like how you just put the words in an hour? Your airplane, hates you and thinks you're emotionally distant headline of the week. Delta Airline CEO just revealed a harsh truth about why your flight was canceled. Yeah, what is it? Your airplane, hates you and things. You're emotionally distant. That's true. I like to keep an emotional distance from my airplane. That's 100% the case. You know, our the edible sunscreen Market finally has an opening headline of the week. France, faces a mustard shortage. I was thinking about this, think about it just barely I'm not that these connection. I'm not, he waving France. Let's start with that. And then I want you to think about this the supply chain savings. You apply the continent to your skin. They have a shortage of it. You don't need the salt, you don't need to pay for the salt. Right. That's not the shortage. Your skin adds the salt to the mixture. I'm just saying, for the condiment Market in general, we got to think bigger, Matt, we got to think bigger. This is your way, this is your weirdest connection yet. I don't maybe not when you get to the next headline. Maybe not although okay write that joke before I found this in this article. So maybe I'm just brilliant, here we go. And now our In our I think we just solved your mustard problem. France. Oh God. titanium dioxide helps give colors a brighter appearance and is commonly used in Mineral sunscreen headline of the week. New lawsuit, claims Skittles. Are unfit for human consumption, due to the presence of a chemical talks. And the company has said, it would stop using. See, look at that. Right. I yeah, that we're getting close to something here. Part where we connected somehow back to mustard. It's still lost. We're just Your your problem-solving is not. Well, you two, don't create anything other than just discussing looking bases, poor Emma. You called me a butt nugget? I got this. So okay. In our, you know, what's an alternative to getting drunk? Literally every single thing in the world that doesn't get you drunk. It's like asking what are alternative numbers to the number six. All of them headline of the week. Athletic Brewing Company is on a mission to reach the flex sober. As Millennials and gen Z seek out alternative to getting drunk. Come on, Emma, help us out with this. What the hell? Yeah, you looking for an alternative to drive other drugs, what's happening? I'm not looking for an alternative to drunk. I'm looking for an alternative to alcohol because that makes me feel bad. And I would like, Be drunk without feeling bad and that's just simply not. Okay, so no, I'm looking to be. I'm looking for a flex. Alcohol life. Not a flex sober. I feel like you are just the market. Know. Emma, just saying she's not looking to stay sober. She's looking to be drunk without the Badness of drugs. No weed is for. That's well, that's right. Okay. All right. I'm confused. So you're not a flex sober. Are you a flex? Sober MRI? Or are you constantly inebriated? Yeah, no, I'm constantly inebriated. Why do you know you're not a flexo? What I wasn't constantly inebriated. In our, she does look ready to pass out. Hey, Ma clickbait finally jumped the shark. Two teenagers were forced to take a bucolic train ride through the English Countryside. Tell Dad. Headline of the week. Two teenagers had to take a 400 mile train trip from London to Scotland after British Airways gave away their seats. I mean, really taking that train. This is what we're doing now. It's awesome. That train is awesome. This is what we're this is the clickbait we're getting offered. Now you had it you take a train to Scotland. Well, you missed the better clickbait headline, which was that four people got kicked off a flight and took a thousand plus dollar. So from London to Paris, What kind of impatience is that anyway? Why don't you just wait for the next train to take you through the channel? What is that their daughter's wedding to go to Damon? Oh, I I like that there was another headline these headlines just keep coming and so many of these travel headlines. What they are. The best part about them is it's usually like one person. Like there was a headline that was like one woman waited five hours in a line. One and I was like moment, why are we, why are we covering the one person? Like, can we do this at scale? You really don't have to leave yourself, you know. No one's forcing to leave your house. All right, Matt truth, give me a break here. I got some more nuggets but you take over for a while. All right, I have pure dystopian, woke data update nuggets today here. Oh, it's ruin your day. Even more than Damian just did. There's no mustard in them, having fun. there's no mustard in these headlines, you know, in our 40 is the new 30? Crypto was the new dollar and obesity is the new hypertension story of the week, Novo, and Lily could be looking at huge sales, boost in obesity. says the Morgan Stanley analyst quote obesity is the new hypertension with the potential to become quote, the next Blockbuster Pharma category Blockbuster baby Look, I'm assuming this is a guy this analyst but he's not wrong. Michael Bay is all over obesity, not wrong Blockbuster. I don't even know what I don't even really know what hype. What is hypertension? High blood pressure, high blood pressure. That's all it is. Okay, in our Mar bug is the new monkeypox. Monkey pox is the new covid in Perico virus is the new obesity stories of the week stories. Number one ganada declares first ever outbreak of a bowl like Marbach virus disease. Number two, with monkeypox spreading globally. Many experts, believe the virus, can't be contained number three, Corona covid, Rises across us amid muted, warnings and murky data. And number four, we were so blindsided, what new parents should know about heroico virus. I wanted to know if I want to know about Herobrine affects infants, but we're just bending ways to scare people with viruses. Now, what's he bulla like Marburg? It's a hemorrhagic fever that kills a 26 to 84% of the people who get it. I don't need to know anymore than that. Thank you. Yeah, it's fun. In our JP Morgan, is the new communist? Coal is the new KGB in Joe manchin is the new Joe Manchurian Candidate. This one I need like eight encyclopedias for this one story of the week. How Joe manchin Doom the Democrats climate plan? Well, we knew this Everybody knew that he's worse, he's just the worst. He's literally. He actually makes all of his money from a Coal Company. Do I hope you first person to make a man sharing candidate joke? I feel like it's right. I believe I am. I have never seen a Joe Manchurian Candidate Joe anywhere. Except for here, speaking of climate here, some fun climate nuggets for you in our Quote, it has a lot to do with the son, says, Republican Debbie, lesko of Arizona, and 2018 headline of the week. High temperatures cause section of UK's Airport runway to lift. Yeah, I bet that's right. He throws Runway actually melted because of the temperature in the UK. Yeah, the airport is rebelling again, in many ways from the CEO Runway Debbie lesko, has says, it has to do with the sun. That's what I asked to do. I that sounds like an anthropomorphic, the airport can't handle abuse. So we're just going to melt Yeah, that's to do. Emma. Yes, science is settled. Its imagine imagine if you slather to a layer of sun blocking mustard across the runway, just coming back in our quote, apparently the climate change, isn't affecting forest fires in. My state says, Republican Bruce Westerman of Arkansas in 2017. Headline of the week. Firefighters battle and explosive cocktail of wind and flames and South-Western France. If you don't know what I'm doing here, I'm doing quotes from stupid. Conservatives about climate change that are stupid and then marrying them with headlines about climate change-related, disasters. Today, what was his point that there since there were there were not any forest fires in Arkansas that there was no client. He looked back. He said he looked at the data and this is in 2017. He said, he looked at the data. And there have been the same amount of forest fires today as there were like five years ago. So climate change isn't real, that's what he said. All right, I know it was that easy I would have gone to Science school. I didn't know that Bruce Westerman was a forest fire expert either, just for a record. 16,000 people evacuated in France but zero grapevines. Have been evacuated, zero. So wine. Still in the front lines of this forest fire. Does it actually still rain in Europe? I don't even know. Now there's no such thing but and Debbie lesko says is because of the sun quote Oh wait in our the Earth is more green than it was years and years ago. And that's because of the earth warming. It's because of carbon because plants do need carbon says, Republican representative and aspiring idiot. Poet Marjorie. Taylor Greene of Georgia. Headline of the week. Yeah. Poets tackle. Climate change in a poetry contest hosted by Saint Andrew's, Episcopal Church in State College. I refuse to make fun of I know but here is here's, I'm not making fun of The Poets. I'm making fun of Marjorie, Taylor Greene and I'm going to quote, the Poetry, here's the Poetry, like, the calving of glaciers, you can hear from a long way off where the land closest to the water folds and buckles. Maybe I will make fun of the poets. know, we love you cowling Calvin, Calvin, Calvin, Calvin of glaciers, That's all I have rough. Go back to mustard. Let's do four more mustard ones. All right, come on. Back to me. I actually have no more. I have no more mustard jokes to the point. Oh, you know, in our we're saved. The startup with an all-male board and all white male c-suite beat the white male billionaire and controlling our brains headline of the Week. Start up Beats musk's neuralink to human trials in the US. Yeah, which, which way do you the future Emma? Who do you want to go with? Okay. The White Noise you have a definitive answer to this? Yeah, actually read this article. So the answer is the other one, the other one, for sure. Yeah. Okay. Because number one, unlike neuralink, they actually have permission from the FD not, you know, I don't know how much this means to me, but the other one does have permission from the FDA to implant chips into people's brains and neuralink doesn't so right now that is probably slightly better. Yeah, that's feels better. It's libertarian. Which is if I'm gonna be controlled by white men I might as well be controlled by white men who have permission. Right? And Too. The other company with their aim is is to implant. They've already done this I think in one so there's one US patient or four Australian patients and their goal is for people with ALS to be able to access the internet and send messages just by thinking, that's what they're doing as opposed to whatever nonsense Elon is doing and I would much rather help disabled people than whatever that one is doing. Yeah, Emma. Can they make an implant for me? So I can't access the internet? Yeah, I was gonna say they do they know what the Internet? It's all put in this gesture box. See what they say. No, I have that outside their office strap the suggestion. Wait wait I like hey Ma two ego baby, billionaire, blowhards are talking about stuff on channel. 38 tell Dad headline of the week. Mark Cuban says the only time he met Bill Gates, he made a joke that made gate so pissed they never spoke again. Yeah. That's so big. Can I say that article is so business inside her? It is really important lesson, I'm sorry because I love you, but I'm sorry. Utterly point I tuned out, I didn't even hear the article because I was busy thinking channel. 38 isn't that UPN in Boston? Isn't that was, I remember when I was a kid, it was with the that's where the Red Sox, the Red Sox weren't right, that's? Yeah, it's a real thing. Literally thinking about Emma sports on TV, used to be free. Sports on TV, used to be free. That's nuts. It is nuts. I've never lived in that world. in our, You obviously suck at striking and his baseball still a thing headline of the week. Dodger, Stadium workers, say they will not strike for Major League. Baseball All-Star Game. Oh, wouldn't that be the time to strike? The MLB All-Star game is a point of contention almost every time. Yeah, remember what he cares? No, because remember after Voting laws, were struck down and like Atlanta Georgia. They were supposed to be hosted it in Atlanta and I think they said, no, we're not doing it. That was back at the power of the woke movement. Now, it's all anti-walk movement. Yeah. They're gonna, I think they're waiting for the opportune time to strike though. Like when the Cincinnati Reds come to town. Oh, nobody's there. You mean Yeah, in our really send a message. Yay, headliner of the week. Lufthansa cancels 2000 more flights sighting staff. Shortages. Yay. That feels like I love all your headline. Yeah, you I know this is the best for you. I mean I thought maybe the pandemic would teach us certain lessons that would you know reduce runaway growth and just like, just crazy level of travel. But something else is getting in its way. Now, I don't know, we something's working. Something's happening this summer I'm liking it. It will have a Ridiculously large impact on carbon. I know. And, you know, you're right to point that out Mac, because in none of these articles do they make that connection nobody's saying like what the benefit of you being forced to stay home because we're and we're worried about handling about heat waves and Europe and climbing, you know, Biden's considering a climate disaster emergency and yet we you know, we moan and groan if aloof tons of flight is canceled I mean, I'm not, but yeah. you know, in our Which ratio do you hate the most, the CEO pay ratio, which is now up to 324 to 1? Or the lost luggage agent phone call ratio which is 25 to 1 head of the week are Canada passenger, trying to find his lost. Luggage made 76 phone calls but only got through to an agent three times. So why we covering the one Air Canada passenger? That's not bad. 25 to 1 is not bad. It's sometimes it's hard to call people. They're busy. What did you have in your luggage that you needed? Anyway, you're toothbrush. You like to complain. I met him. He just likes to complain. I mean, I don't look not to just I hate dealing with dude. You're like, I hate inefficiencies in places and being left on hold. I've had to do it many many times. We all have. I just don't do the things anymore put on speakerphone. And do a crossroad puzzle. Know. I literally just don't call anyone or leave my house. Just nothing happened. Why anywhere? Yeah, I wish the most horrible thing is like a Mountainside. You're terrible person. The most horrible thing that doesn't end in any fatality or injury the most annoying horrible thing. So that when you complain about it to us I have absolutely no sympathy. I can complain about everything so don't worry about that. We've proved that with this show. But you know what? I don't do, I don't call like regular, you know, minimum wage workers. Plane of them. I complain to you, too. I irritate you too. I mean, look yeah. Here's my problem. Yeah, we called my wife had to get a new phone because they're old phone broke and we called Verizon and the Apple Store for two straight days. We were calling over and over again. We waited on hold for six hours, one night. There's no headline. Know I have to wait on call business inside. I hope you're listening for six hours. Have your next story that happened, and no one wrote about it. That's all I'm saying. And I had to make that headline more quickly. He could be surgeon weights on hold. That's true. She's a surgeon, right? You know, she was on call that night, she had to Route calls through my city and then they turned my phone off accidentally. It was great, but there's no headline about it. Is my point. That's, that's the thing that gets me, not ours and waiting that sucks in our ESG nerd clickbait headline of the Year headline of the week here. All right, Ready for this one carbon is dirty secret of Hotel industry. Greenwashing Eco ratings. What? Come on that? That's some ESG. Nerdy genius, right there. Is it not you really get deep in there? First of all, it's so hyper-specific. Embodied carbon is. It is its own thing. Okay, sure. And then the hotel industry and then how it ruins Eco ratings. What is an eagle rating? This is the greatest thing ever bought. A carbon has to do with the cost of the carbon cost of the construction to make your, to make your hotel more. Eco-friendly. Am I wrong about that? Yeah, it's like the concrete and cement are the most carbon intense materials, and every hotel is built with it and there. So this without reading the article just reading the headline. Yes, it sounds like someone is trying to drum up anger against hotels. Yes, for using some men, right? It's not the hotel's. It's, they're trying to jump up anger against the Eco rating. Of the hotel's for the cement that was used to build them. Okay, let's love it. That's the right answer. Emma in our witch. Do you prefer? Rags to Riches, who Okay, Farm to Table. Boyz to Men. Or poop to burps headline of the week. Cows under climate microscope as poop to burps gets treatment. That's meant to be a ratio or, or conversion. But this is the now, the full, the full gamut here, we're looking at. We're looking at a livestock from poop to burps. Damien, I have to make an announcement that, oh, part of my brain, some some part of my brain has officially morphed into a part of your brain. Oh, because I saw this headline earlier and made the, if I were to make a joke that is the joke, I would have made which part Boyz to Men. Yeah, Boys to Men. I was always that one. I was at the table farm table. I was Boyz to Men all the way and voicemail I'm having the poop sauce with a nice Side of burp. And finally, for me at least because I was gonna say the day at the end here and our yeah. But 2154 is gonna kick some serious ass headline of the week. equal pay is still 132 years off world economic Forum predicts Two. 132 years of exactly 100 132 size, but the world economic Forum, really, I mean, they they're very precise individuals. I mean it's not a headline without the two. I get it. Like no one says like we're 130 years from equal pay. Everyone's like not I don't care about that but 132 sounds like you know what you're talking about and then I'm going to click on it but come on we know that's not a real thing. This could apply to the oversight Port too. Facebook's oversight board that one of its decisions might have a positive effect on the corporation 132 years from now. They know what they need. They need what they need to do in their next annual report, which we haven't covered that, they had an annual report. Their next annual report used to say the seven decisions that we actually made. Will have an impact in 12.3 years. Like that's where they need to get to in order for anyone to care. This is just out of here. So my segment today is going to be some hate nuggets because I hated the trends today. Seems like every nugget for you. The trends are there to hunt you. Yeah, the trends are there to either dig me into some poor deep hole or to be fun. And today it was a deep hole and it wasn't working for me. So our hate nuggets for today. Number one, Texas governor. Greg Abbott didn't go to the funerals of any Uvalde victims schedule. Document show that I hate you. Greg, I hate you is the joke. That's my favorite one. Yep. Um, number two, Nancy Pelosi's husband just brought over one million dollars of this chip stock right before a 52 billion dollar. Subsidy vote, is there still time to tag along this headline, might as well have read. Nancy Pelosi and her husband are inside trading. And so, should you like, I just enough already? It's This one pissed. Me look, you have to admire headline writers who saw a headline that Nancy Pelosi's husband. Bought the stock before the subsidy vote. and then, Made a headline that was. Can you trade on his trade? Yep, that's where they went. They didn't go with. Its really bad that he traded they went with. Can you also make money money? Money money? Yeah, I like it. Yeah. No. Matt you hit right on that. Anger spot for me real nice. That was exactly a good job. I'm gonna punch you in your anger spot. Yeah. Oh, and number three. Millennials are the reason you're paying sky high prices for everything. These days investment strategists. Said what? And my response to this is going to be in tweet form that other people posted that BuzzFeed collected, my two favorite like that. Yeah. Wow. I wonder why Millennials waited so long to make major purse purchases. Truly a mystery. Oh, well, time to find 100 year, old hedge fund manager, and ask him his expert opinion on unions and nice from Ursula V doots. Complaint is that they're simply too many Millennials in the size of their generation is to blame. So, the next time, there's a think piece about why Millennials aren't having enough babies. Just remember gang, your fighting inflation? What is the heart? What is the Heart of that. Emma. Do you know what's the heart of what that statement? The heart of that statement is that why is the he blaming Millennials? He's blaming Millennials because they're not spending enough money. Literally he's blaming Millennials for hoarding, their money and being seven years behind everyone else. Not according to distress. Second thing that if people could buy houses earlier in life, they probably would, they're not withholding their money in real estate purchases to boost and I can't talk about it. I like I know first hand I live in a real estate market that is terrible and they, they just simply can't. They could never with the jobs that they offer here in Portland. Maine, you simply can't buy a house. It's no know. Where is the wait? Where's the headline boomers are the reason. Okay, is melting. I would like that anger spot on today. I'm just punching the anger spot but genetics, we are. We are not responsible for anyone ever to all crazy people. Yeah. Trying at least I'm trying you're doing your best and I appreciate, right? I really and I just offered to let you come. Hang out in Norway with me. So yeah, that's all I need to Mountainside. That was Damian roles. Mustard covered Damien Rollins and Emma lurking. Not on a Mountainside and I am Matt McCarty. We are free flow. Media tomorrow is woke Wednesday. Come back for that. Goodbye.