Business Pants – 2022-09-15

oh, Hey, ho. Live from the first show in months years, where I forgot to write down my really corny and horrible opening, its business pants. Sure. Anyone cared about that this is pants Thursday. Featuring the data Queen. Oh it's right. The data Queen's here. She is, yeah. Staring at me on comfortably and Matt, our chief BS correspondent. I think might be frozen, is her. She Frozen or she's just the most awkward person. I ever there we go. I hear he's giggling. She's back. It's Thursday, September 15th, 2022 recording, live out of the great region of New England. And today, Matt, I'm not going to talk to Ari because I don't know what the hell's going on with her. Matt, we are doing The good game. My favorite game. Oh look, this is a real crab. Crowd is Sleepy today. I like, I like that on the live stream lame. So you can't like if you're not watching the live stream which no one is, why would not be? I don't know why but if you were watching live stream what you would see is Ari is literally like frozen until we can hear her voice but she's Frozen in Time staring at using Well, I imagine are you. Oh, there she is. She's back. She's moving. Well, I imagine so Ari, here's a little insight information Ari. And Matt actually worked together in the same office but I imagine that's what your day is. Like, Matt is just Ari uncomfortably staring at you, is it? I mean, is that all that really happens? She doesn't stare at me, she stares at the computer because at numbers all day, you too, have been promising, a new platform website. You know. I don't see that yet. So I imagine that she's just staring at you and then you're yelling at your dog or something. I don't know what you're doing. I would love to yell at a dog. If I had a dog, I don't have a dog. Yeah, just do it. Stop fooling around stop. Let's start. Let me explain to you how this works. I pick some headlines from across the business news, he news world. That seemed good to me the headlines that they make me feel good. I feel like this guy, I don't know he's good good news here but are they really? I don't know. So I throw them by YouTube or The most incredible ESG pundits known to the world, right? I mean, yeah, that's true that and you tell me on a scale from 0 to 10 whether they're actually good or not 10, being really, good 0 being sucky. I'll remind everyone that last week, Ari came in with the highest score ever at a 8.1 and Matt even was in a good mood at a 6.7. Come on, let's go. Let's do this week. Come on. You're getting good though. I did, we saw this week's headlines and they look good. Wait, you saw the headlines reading the news. So the headlines. Feel good. Let's go. Let's do it. What's number start with the home run. So even a home run. I mean it's a grand slam. I mean this is a Okay, I just don't I don't usually lead the pundits. How, how this is? It less than a 10? I don't really understand but maybe they can, maybe they'll poke some holes in it. Matt don't wear black. Today is looking a little villainous. So let's see. Ready? First headline. Patagonia chair says we are turning capitalism on its head by making the Earth. Our only shareholder, that's the headline. I knew you were gonna start with that one. Yeah, what does it mean? It means quickly that Patagonia is giving the complete owner. The family that runs Patagonia is giving the complete ownership of his company to a trust. And the trust only job is to act as a non-profit and to give all the profits away to help solving climate change. That's it. This is a, the first of its come. I mean, now we ever seen anything remotely like this ever. There's so much enthusiasm. This is crazy. I mean, I don't know how Matt is gonna destroy this, but this is, how do you destroy this? I'll try, this is the greatest thing I've come on. I mean, we've never seen. I, I mean, I know one of the Walton family members bought the Denver Broncos. Is that the same thing? That's exactly the same, okay? I don't know. I've never seen anything remotely. Like, this is absolutely insane. So Ari you just attend, you just attend, you have no other thoughts other than 10. That's it. This is great enough. It's a thought. Matt was your thoughts but you know, So the trust is directed by mandate to donate. Basically the all the profits that come into Patagonia will now like go to fight like do advocacy work and and fight environmental, you know, issues. So by mandate they basically donated the entire. It's like, if you bought a plot of land and then said we're gonna get, it'll be a land trust and no one can ever build on it. Like the government like that land trust. Is that right? Can I put a bench on that land on that? No, no, no, not put a bench on Patagonia in the Patagonia ownership you can in the Patagonia offices. You could just put one bed. That's that I bought that going. Yeah, I think this is a 10. There's no way it's not a 10. But I mean by 10 million, oh yeah, what is not like the beginning of a trend? This company is a private company held by them an Emily entirely. They had no shareholders saying Earth is our only shareholder prior to Earth being their only shareholder. It was like, wasn't it's not how dare I just like, it's a 10, it's fantastic, it's amazing. But they even said, quote, as a closely held company. This huge change was easier for us than others, which is because I know Mark, I know Mark. Zuckerberg is a big fan of our show, the business, the business pants empyre. Does he was. So he's listening, so he could do the same thing, it's a closely held company, so he could, but it's not a trend, it's just a really well thing before we get to the next headline that time. Yeah, I understand you're singing It's not a trend but just importantly, will the anti woke police did the santis people will they will. They try to prevent these company owners from making decisions about their own company, because obviously, it's, it's feeding into a horrible woke agenda, right? What can they do to prevent? This is my question, I pretty sure what they're going to do is never go hiking again so they can avoid wearing Patagonia clothes that's probably the way they moving on next headline. Uh, oil giant shell appoints Renewables head as boss. So the CEO at Shell is stepping down and they are replacing him with another man who is the head of Renewables that. I mean It sounds like, it could be good. I don't know. I mean I'm a dope so I don't know what this means, but Renewables, I like renewable. So help me out. This was a little tricky because he's ahead of gas in Renewables. Which, oh, begs. The question? Why are those even together? Like, well, maybe he can change that. Maybe they meant, maybe they actually meant gassy Renewables. Oh yes. He just left out the Sy. Chickpea accident. Yeah, chickpea mobiles, this new person has been a shelf for like 25 years. I don't know what differently this person would do. It sounds like by throwing Renewables in the headline. You know, they're sounds like, greenwashing, to be honest. So, you're accusing the BBC of greenwashing or accusing shell of greenwashing? Well, the BBC did not put gas and Renewables true headline. And I fell for it. I clicked on it. I included in our show. Where's our clapping? Where's my clapping? This re is, I don't know. Entire audience. I have audience responds to you like almost immediately. Shut off audience. Oh listen. Let me too. All right. Come on. Give it a score. Stop, stop filibustering. Oh two. Oh what? You know? I don't even think you have any logic behind that too? Matt, give us an actual answer with my actual reasoning. All right, there's some breaking news coming in. The breaking news is that guy doesn't do Renewables. Wait, what? The guy did you read his resume? You can go to the Shell website. Just tell us questions done. Yeah. Renewables to his title in the last 12 months. He spent shell and in 12 months, he became the Renewables head. In fact, when you read the rest of his bio, it says nothing about Renewables, it mentions carbon one other time and anything about efficiency. That's the BBC. Reuters didn't even fall for the bait. Reuters wrote, this is their headline, shell picks gas, veteran Swan, CEO, to lead transition. Well, like wait to be fair to the BBC. It is a period of mourning in the UK. You can't even use your bike. You can't use bike racks. So they're, you know, what are they supposed to do? They don't have access to their computers, they don't have access to their brains, what is Oh, look, all I'm saying is this guy's core skill is is sucking Dino juice out of the ground. Okay, just give me a notice. It's too. It's a two because the headline is, as misleading as it gets. It's a ticket up next. The next headline, this is for you Ari. Pepsi and ADM. Turned to carbon Friendly Farms to meet a mission goals. This sounds like something you would include in your goodies of the week. Yeah. Yeah. You know. There, are you feeling about this? I don't tell me why? Tell me why? All the crap they make? Like, what kind of crap this Pepsi make? What are you talking about? The category should be drugs here? Not woke data, like, you know, what do you doing? Anyway, I like this. She understands our categorization system so well now but you're right. Pepsi is a drugs company. Yes, I like it selling sugar to the masses. Visually unprecedented as well. As far as like farming, technology goes why? And the Deploying. This across, I think it was four or five states a partnering with actual Farmers. Not just big actually, okay, I understand. Yes. So, I'm good, then that's it, that's good. Yeah that's good right? Good farmers are going to be able to like produce things that they're gonna take and make our drugs great. They're gonna be able to produce corn. Oh that's what they fucking make corn. We need corn syrup, come on something, which Pepsi product. Are you really excited for a generative agriculture? Let me list some for you. Okay, is it Tostitos? Is it Sierra Mist? Is it Doritos? Is it Tropicana? Is it? Is it munchos? Is it Tazo? Is it Munchies. They actually have okay and Munchies that you can choose from, you know, how these are frequent flyers at my house. Just the, this is It's good to teach regenerative agriculture and big AG needs to embrace like that. But this is just, this is all this all feels like we need to stop making so much fucking corn. So congratulations for making it possible to return to make more morning sugar. I'm gonna give it a four Are just so, you know, it's two million Acres of Farmland. Could eliminate 1.4 million metric, tons of greenhouse gases moving on. Oh, Regulators gas. That gives people, it's not going to remove that, will it? Renewable gas regulators. Put the brakes on. Microsoft's Activision acquisition. So remember, we reported a long time ago, that that terrible company activation at least the leadership is terrible. I shouldn't say that people, there are terrible Microsoft seemingly bailing them out by buying them, but it's still held up and, you know, the EU and UK is this. So, is this good or bad? You figure this one out, the writer missed a huge opportunity here because I read the article and it's all about Call of Duty. It's because of Call of Duty. That's so, what are the writer leaves out? If you if what do you leaders are pointing out? Is that customers will no longer be able to access Call of Duty from their PlayStation systems now. Right immediately. But he Competitive. Like this is hilarious. Who even knew the Europeans played video games. Out of 10. Wow. Matt, what do you think? First of all I wanted to, I wanted to give it a 10 for headline alliteration. Activision acquisition is one of my favorite dual things that you Activision acquisition. I like that technically, I think that's ascendants but you're actually, right. But what I liked was that everything else I thought was stupid, how is it that? Facebook can continue to own 90% of the social media landscape with no Anti-Trust action, but we are arguing about Call of Duty for 15 year olds. Oh, hold your horses. Stop the clock. You, it's not like Facebook owned like all like Instagram too, right? I mean, it's not like they write. They all I don't I don't want to tell you this but they do okay. All right, what you score on this one? What do you think? Um, I think it's the stupidest antitrust. Action doesn't seem a little odd, the most who gives the shit antitrust? I could possibly think of what exactly are they Anti-Trust? Call of Duty. Call of Duty. Really? What are you? Yes. One video game. That's the Antichrist. Action. It's a zero. This is the dumbest thing I've ever heard of. Okay. So dumb. Yeah, cuz you know, I I still support this acquisition because as I pointed out before Duty Activision, the employees, the employees Activision, who had to deal with Bobby kotick should Benefit from, Microsoft's leadership. Microsoft course a darling in the ESG world. I would love any good reasons. I'm a fan. I would actually, if they, if they stop the acquisition and I Activision has to go out back on its own and the price drops precipitously. And we all realize Bobby kotick, still there. The next year, they're gonna vote that entire board out. There's no way those people stick around. They're like Warren, Buffett was probe for insider trading because he like hung out. He bought a whole bunch of Activision nine seconds before. His big buddy, Bill Gates, bought Activision. There's multiple insider trading, like probes happening about this acquisition. It would just be fantastic if Anti-Trust was like, no, Call of Duty is aligned too far. You can acquire and that's what it's, it's fantastic. Don't tell me, okay. All right. California says, Amazon ruined online, shopping, Susan for driving up prices. And let me also add that this lawsuit mirrors A case that was dismissed in April at a DC. But now on this one, the Department of Justice is backing the appeal of this. So so yeah. This is a momentum here. What do you think about this? California? Says Amazon ruined online shopping center? I would say is correct also Amazon, what a control freak of their Marketplace. I mean, They think their capitalists but clearly they're not this is super rigged so I hope you know it all goes down 10 waiting for a number. What's the number 10? Yeah she gave it attention. She's just like it. That's all tens. I like no it's only three out of five pin. Shut up, come on. What do you think ruined is a bit strong? I think so dramatic. Oh, I mean ruined, solid ruined. No, no. Like, like how about limited the competition in online words? This is no, but that's doesn't make a great headline. So, I, I'm gonna give it a seven. I think it's, I think it's this is actual antitrust because they quash competition, and but ruined, I mean, dial it back a little bit, right? Like, we still are online shopping and they've been doing it for so long so I don't know I guess I don't know what prompted this but Moving on, they finally woke up. CEO says Disney stood our ground talking about bald Bob Jacob. Matt, in case you're wondering and I like this call him CEO. CEO says Disney stood, our ground against barrage of attacks over, don't say gay legislation. Oh no. I don't know why I could, which ground did they stand on the one that shifted the one where they said nothing? And then they said something and then they think, also the fact that it's Disney, it's Florida. Stood, our ground stand, your ground. It all just rubs me the wrong way. So no, but there were, but there were again. This guy there on the good side against the santis already. What are you talking about the wrong way? All right. It's like I don't know what it's like we stood around but we're with you. Keep your guns. They still be around so much that they can continue to donating to Republicans. Oh, I like this is actual facts. I like actual facts. Come on back, give me a number. This is this I read the speech that Bob chapek said out loud, and then put it in the headline. And we know, we're just trolling him with his headline because we know they didn't stand their ground. In fact what it was done waffle, they waffled quite a bit. Yeah, that's the opposite. Waffling is the opposite of standing ones around it. I mean what? Yeah, we're taking a Waffle House off, the Wallflower around. It doesn't really shreds everywhere. I know this from this jewelry. Moving on, we have another horrible racist, NBA owner, they got all right, finally, here's the headline. Finally some awesome NBA headline racism. I like that, for the context, the proper context areas that the previous one, the NBA booted, Made it. That's right. Yeah. So here's the latest headlines. That tell credit. Shut up. No no, they're so excited about more racism. Here we go. So it's a very ironic audience today, a very sarcastic audience. Here we go here. NBA suspends Sons owner Robert Sarver for a year over workplace harassment use of racial slurs. Okay this is big news, are you? I mean suspending an owner. That's a find him 10 million dollars but I remind you are. He owns the team? So I mean really he should be able to do what he wants, right? But they're suspending him for years this good. We think I have mixed feelings about this again. Go ahead because when I first read the headline I thought they were talking about the Connecticut Sun like oh the WNBA team. It was that matter. Oh, what happened? So you saw the next guns. Like, who is that? I don't know why. So you saw NBA suspends, you saw NBA suspended and you put a phantom W in there. Our reaction was, who is that? I was a real and then you saw sons and you and you dropped the S. So you really your is really about your reading comprehension is like a sixth grade level. Anyway, I don't understand how just a Year's suddenly going to fix this man. However, I did learn that. They also find him 10 million dollars in 10 million dollars is the max that Well. Compared to what? I mean, I'm not, I'm sure the value of a team is probably in the low billion. So I'm guessing these teams are very worth, a lot of money, even teams have never heard of whatever. Anyway, yes, so, I quickly looked at their revenue for last year and it was estimated to be 240 million which means this is like 4%. Now, if we find Facebook 4% for any of the shit they did, that would be billions of dollars like 4% their revenue was what 240 million. That's it. Okay, you're saying quickly are none of this seems quickly to me. I think it's a great thing that they find him. I don't know what a Year's gonna do. I'm so mixed feelings about this. Oh six. Matt. Why did they not? Donald Sterling him, I don't know. Yeah, why not what? I mean? What just, just boot them. I don't know what I, what I read was that Adam Silver when they booted Sterling for arguably less bad things like he did. Not wait, wait slow down for a second. Did they actually boot Sterling or was the pressure so profound Sterling? Read the tea leaves and realized like no forced him to sell forced him out. Yeah. Forced him was like Nixon resigning. No, no. And I think as a like the owners didn't like it. All the other owners didn't like it at all. So this reaction there are actually Adam Silver took a page out of Roger. Goodell, the NFL, oh commissioner, it's not play book and gave this almost the same exact punishment as Dan Schneider. Yeah. So Sarver got the Dan Schneider treatment. Is that the kind of treatment that we think is appropriate? The guy owns the team makes his wife, the pretend president of the company, they do some diversity training and it comes out like a year later that they're even more terrible than we ever thought. I don't know. This to me, feels like if he did something like, the stuff, it sounds like he did was, you know, somewhere between one of the mill asshole, CEO, and heinous and individual, right? If that's Like bootable for Don Sterling. Should be bootable here and Dan Schneider should not be our comp. I'm gonna give this a Four. uh, moving on, here's one for you are Ready. This one says it all the headline. This is no way. This is clickbait ready. California. Another one. California California says the beaver. Can be super hero in fighting climate change. Yeah, finally. Oh, Finally, it's just the best. Come on, Ari. That's a lot to say this week. um, but what I found super awesome is that the Beavers they have literally launched the best PR image changing of all the animals. Like, I was reading the Articles like, huh, I remember when like, oh no, let's move the. Let's get rid of the Beavers here because you're damning up, all these, all the stuff and it's gonna throw it, you know, the world, right? So, even in the article, it says, in recent decades, they have been deemed a nuisance, a nuisance rodent responsible for flooding farmlands and look, now, they're being called upon by country branding. It's like from Facebook to meta beavers did amazing. I'm gonna give this a 10. How about this? The California Department of Fish and Wildlife posted, its first job listing for its new Beaver, restoration unit. So I'm giving it 10 to the beaver restoration unit. I'm all so going to give a 10 to the honey bee Revival team, which is likely to come next and then 15 for the Bobcat development Brigade, which Why are we not doing this everywhere? Every single government agency should just be an animal with a SWAT, team attached to it. All right, it's a 10 moving on, moving on. All right, this is another one for you. Here's the simple headline. Thanks to an Innovative new paint. This school's playground just got 12 degrees cooler. Come on. This come on, come running now. Seeks to paint the entire world in an effort to cool the Earth by 2030. Just kidding. I thought you breaking news. Yeah I like this. I like this. A Barry. Um yeah no the playground can get real hot like demon and I were talking about parking lots we were Disney super hot or any large parking. Lots more everybody I think this is, this is this is good, this is good. I'm giving a Nate. Okay, you're wrong. I prefer that the kids, which belts I want them to melt on the playground. Are we really gonna make climate action like a thing? If our kids are nice and cool on the playground because we put some stupid paint on it. In fact I was crying is cooler. It does not mean it's gonna be cool on the playground. I subscribe. Well from 112 to 100 degrees, okay? To Herschel Walker, who is the Republican senatorial candidate for nominee Georgia? This is, I prefer climate change which is quote in a July 9th appearance. He spoke about climate change, suggesting that Georgia's, quote, good, are decides to float over China replacing China's, quote, bad are, which goes back to Georgia, where quote, we got to clean that back up that I think. Sums up the climate crisis. We should not be focused on paint. We should be focused on the bad are from China. So I'm giving this a three. and finally, in our September 15th 2022, good game featuring our business pants pundits are in Matt, Like this, this is a great headline. I'll just I'll let it speak for itself. Rivian electric pickup Powers, vasectomy during power outage. Come on. Okay. Yes, medical facility. Not have generators. I don't. Well, they do, they have they have a review, like a truck, what, you know, understanding the head. The headline, we talked about. I read the Tweet, so the doctor tweeted that out, right? And he just sounded so eager about it. I just, you know, I'm not a conspiracy theorist but I'm pretty sure he did this on purpose just so he could try out his phone new toy. Oh, look at my oh that's a really up there with them. Yeah, I don't know, I'm gonna give. What do you think? Six. Just two amazing things happening here. Is that a truck? A car is powering a facility to do medical procedures and two. A man. Can't get someone pregnant. Those are two fantastic. So true, is there anything better than those two things? I'm giving it a 10, I love this story. Wow, Matt is 10 happy today? Yeah. All right, let's get to our scores and then we can get the hell out of here. Oh Ari a little set both of you a little sadder this week. Are you coming in at 7? Matt coming in a really lowly 5.3. That's it. That's a good game. That's my normal store September 15th, 22. That's true. It's a little low for you. Well, there were some good stories and then like you just need to make next week's stories. All beavers. 100% Beaver, good game. That's Damian Ross. And already did the queen. I am scared. We have three float media. If you like this. Do some stuff. Listen, to more of it, could you send it to a friend? Could you, please like, subscribe to it? Could you maybe give it five stars? My mom didn't even write us. Did you know? My mom doesn't even like, listen to this or Raid. Us. Can't even get my parents. That's so good. It is. So if you like this, you're one of the few. Please pretty. Please do something about it. We'll be back tomorrow. With a week wrap up until then, goodbye.